death to the cats

[scoop10]

do i

1 kill cats (My personal fav)

2 let them live and crap all over my house

3 kill kill kill

4 death death daeth




im realy stuck here boys any help much appreciated

[TheRam]

A desire to kill pets is the first sign of a serial killer.

[ChocoSanta]

If youre cat killing skills are as good as your ability to create a sensible post subject then the cats would most likely kill you.

As a cat-person im deeply offended by this comment. You shall be hearing from the rspca shortly.

Much love XX

[Soccerman771]

First, where did the cats come from? Second, don't kill the furry little innocent things. Third, please whatever you do don't become a serial killer. Fourth, have a "cat sale" or donate them, or whatever....peace.

On a lighter note, I was cleaning my house the other day and found one of my cat's diaries from a couple years ago:

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from shredding the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant and cough it up on the carpeting.

DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed (again).

DAY 762 - Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan...

DAY 768- I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo". What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth and the tiny bit of flesh under my claws.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies". Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.

[Nighthawk22]

[quote=""ChocoSanta""]If youre cat killing skills are as good as your ability to create a sensible post subject then the cats would most likely kill you.

As a cat-person im deeply offended by this comment. You shall be hearing from the rspca shortly.

Much love XX[/quote]

LOL

[Highlander999]

You'll get no support from me. I love my two cats. Better than bloody dogs.

[TheRam]

Highlander, don't start a dogs vs cats debate.....
Soccer, that was hilarious, seriously.. GG.
Scoop, to point out something that was only semi-implied before, this was a stupid topic and you could try to word things better, spell and whatnot.

[ChocoSanta]

Soccerman, that is easily the best post i have read. Im giving you a fancy hat, 5 gold stars and a firm pat on the back as way of reward. Good show old boy.

Much love XX

[scoop10]

im sorry to post this (cammel)

i love my cats

they had just run riot and i was annoyeed this was a silly post but i will not try to correct my grammer no matter what :twisted:

soccer that was s funy lol

[scoop10]

[quote=""Soccerman771""]

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies". Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
[/quote]




LOLLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLLOLOLL sooo true my cats told me and all n30 boys are invited



cammel my cat just walked up to me and was sick on my feet i dont want to kill them i want to string them up ........

[Hydrovert5]

i dont want to kill them i want to string them up ........

You need therapy, my friend.

[LaZy]

even though Im not a cat person myself I find Soccers post awesome!

scoop I have a "werid" sense of humour myself, but i simply cannot c where ur trying 2 go with this bro

Out

[emperoral]

Well I have just got a kitten which is about 7 weeks old. This thing believe it or not so far has used the litter tray each time I am amazed but it took me awhile to show him how it was used, think I scared him as my bare backside laid what the cat would of thought the world biggest log ever. LOL

But yes he use's the tray. Next are the claws of death my poor legs or whats left of them need some serious tlc let alone the furniture serves me right into getting a new sofa recently.

Kitten I mean it! seems to think that i am made out of its favourite cat food and wants to eat me at every golden opportunity (or has adder planted an assasian into my household?) The good news is that well it is better than me at AOE3 so if you play me and lose you have been done over by a 7 week old kitten!

[TheRam]

Stupid topic, but some friggin hilarious responses..
Oh god..

[Soccerman771]

[quote=""emperoral""]Well I have just got a kitten which is about 7 weeks old. This thing believe it or not so far has used the litter tray each time I am amazed but it took me awhile to show him how it was used, think I scared him as my bare backside laid what the cat would of thought the world biggest log ever. LOL

But yes he use's the tray. Next are the claws of death my poor legs or whats left of them need some serious tlc let alone the furniture serves me right into getting a new sofa recently.

Kitten I mean it! seems to think that i am made out of its favourite cat food and wants to eat me at every golden opportunity (or has adder planted an assasian into my household?) The good news is that well it is better than me at AOE3 so if you play me and lose you have been done over by a 7 week old kitten![/quote]

Get 1 more kitten. Claw problem solved as they'll beat up on each other and not you. I guaruantee results. I had the same problem and wouldn't have feet if it weren't for getting a second cat. That and you could name the second one Badger... :twisted: